Our society has long thrived on the idea of strong powerful men who function either as protectors or predators of women and children. The truth is quite different. Anybody can be a victim of sexual assault. The assault is not about your masculinity. It was about someone else’s aggression. It can be helpful for men to remember that sexual assault is not about sex or sexual orientation or about who they are as men–it’s about someone else thinking that they can control another person’s body.
Being male does not make you invincible to attack. If there were multiple assailants, weapons, or drugs involved, you certainly cannot be expected to defend yourself. Males can also be deceived or tricked into entering risky situations, just as females can, that is part of being human. Whatever you did to handle the situation was the right thing because you survived.
Many male survivors of sexual assault are particularly concerned that they might end up abusing someone else. It’s important to remember that men can control their own behavior–survivors don’t have to become abusers. It is not uncommon for male survivors of sexual violence to have a lot of questions about their sexuality and masculinity
You have needs and emotions that deserve to be expressed. You have gone through a traumatic experience where you may feel you lost a bit of yourself. You have the right and need to grieve. See the attachments below for more information on male victims of sexual assault.
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